Sunday, January 1, 2012

When is a hair cut not a hair cut?

Detail of "The Red Horse" by Stephanie Tihanyi (copyright held by artist)
Why do women after having long flowing locks, all over a sudden decide to cut off all their hair?. Hair can be a deeply emotional topic for women. When I think of my hair, I think of how my husband loves my long blond hair. I think of this as I look down at the thick lock that lies in my hand, (still tied with the pink elastic band) I have just sheared from the back of my neck with the household scissors, while sitting in front of the dress mirror, on the bedroom floor. If he loves this thing so much, why do I despise it now, just as much!. Why do I seem to hate, what he seems to love about me?. What is going on. Hair is deeply sensual. When a woman cuts off her hair, attracting the opposite sex is probably furthest from her mind. Short, chic hair is a lot more likely to declare personal independence than to signify interest in extra- marital dating. Ah ha! Now it seems to make sense.  We recently had an argument. Some time after that, it came to a point where I did not want to have my long locks for a single moment more. This has to do directly with my distress and unhappiness at this time. When I did the haircut, I did it myself, I did not have the money for a hair dresser and I did not want to take his money to do it, that is very important to me. It is very personal. I felt like I was changing more than my appearance; I was taking the needed step to get on with my life. In a way, I felt I was cutting off something I had held close for a long time, something that had become unbearable. May be it was the need to please, the need to please... too much, the need to please, I put before what I needed for myself. I think that is the reason women cut off their hair: The chance to begin anew, to restart, a chance to say, "no way, no more of this, now we re-negotiate". The hair cut is a way for the outer self to express a transition taking place under the skin. It is the most personal way of expressing change. OK, my partner will not like it, but its my way of saying, I am in charge of me, not you!,. I will decide what I like and find good about myself and not you!,.  You wont decide what's worthy about me, I will!. Cutting her hair, is a woman's  expression of self value over her need for approval or to please other people.

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